Anti-Slut Defense is any action a girl takes to shut down sexual escalation, often suddenly and counter to her previous behavior. Typically they do this by breaking a sexual mood through sudden, often irrational, inexplicable verbal or non-verbal non-compliance.
It tends to strike just when you think everything is lined up and the full-close is inevitable.
Why does it exist?
It boils down to the Madonna/Whore dichotomy.
Madonna(not the singer)–Jesus’s mother–a woman so perfect and pure that not only did she give birth to the son of god, but she did it without having to resort to dirty, dirty sex
Whore–A woman who will do any sexual act with anyone for the right price, as often as often as she can.
Every culture has there own scale that runs from Madonna to Whore and you can place any behavior somewhere on that scale. Each culture draws a line somewhere along that scale and anything on the right half of the scale is Whore behavior and anything on the left is Madonna behavior.
In particularly conservative cultures a woman showing her face, for example, or being in the presence of a non-family male without a chaperon is whore behavior. In more liberal cultures a woman can wear a mini-skirt with no panties, get sloshed, make out with every guy in the bar and then if some guy tries to take her home she can still say with a totally straight face, “I’m not that kind of girl.” << Anti-Slut Defense!
Anti-Slut Defense happens whenever you start to get close to the border(or cross the border) between the Madonna and the Whore and a girl wants to preserve her Madonna status. For some behaviors in some cultures, once a whore always a whore, while in others it’s a matter of balancing the amount of Madonna behaviors with the amount of Whore behaviors to maintain the right image.
This is why the longer you’re with a woman the kinkier sex becomes. She might have wanted you to hang her from the ceiling and drip candle wax on top of her while watching lesbian porn the first time you had sex with her, but she doesn’t want to ask.
She knows that if she saves that for later, you’ll see her as a “really nice girl who’s a tiger in the sack” rather than as a “total freak who can’t get enough”. In fact, she knows that bringing out her Whore too soon could even disqualify her from long term relationships with the guys that she most wants to do the most depraved things her imagination can conjure.
Anti-Slut Defense can range anywhere from, “I don’t usually do this,” right before a woman gives you a blow job on Ferris wheel on the first date, to a girl refusing to give you her phone number because, “I don’t give my number to people I just met,” to a sudden “Don’t touch me!” when you’ve gotten lots of kino compliance, as a she rushes out of your house because she suddenly remembered she has to paint her toenails for her big presentation next month on the evolution of frog spinal cords.
In milder cases the simple re-assurance, of an “I know, baby,” will do it. In other cases more qualification(especially) or more comfort will do the trick.
Setting up lots of plausible deniability, handling logistics very smoothly, “2-steps forward, 1 back” and pull-push can make the interaction slide so smoothly that her Anti-Slut Defense doesn’t have a chance to engage.
You should save hardcore sexcalation for a sexcalation location whenever possible and stay away from cheap thrills like make-outs in the park or the club where you play your hand too soon.
